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Post by Ceran on Sept 17, 2021 13:34:47 GMT
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Post by Ceran on Sept 17, 2021 13:51:34 GMT
Ultimate Self-Control: The Triad
The Triad - 3 things that control your life.
Physiology & Posture (Body)
Mental (Mind)
Language (Spirit)
E.g depression
1) Show me how you really get depressed (what do you do with your body, what do you focus on)
2) Now double the depression
3) How depressed are you on a scale from 0 to 10
Physiology & Posture (Body)
Head, hands, shoulder, breathing,
Mental state
What do you focus on?
What do you picture?
What do you think about?
Language
Which words do you use?
What do you say to yourself?
Which tone of voice? (up or down)
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Post by Ceran on Sept 17, 2021 14:08:11 GMT
Emotional Patterning and Repatterning
How do you stop an emotion?
The way to manage and control an emotion
is to link them to action and meanings
-> Switch your physiology to switch your mental states
The crazy eight
Depression to anger to rage to sadness back to depression.
Moving from depression to anger and back to anger.
Which needs is answering our depression?
Switching from depression to ecstasy
Remember a peak of happiness
Visualize it, breath the way you do, focus on what you were thinking, hear what you were hearing. MAKE A SOUND. Put it into your body. See what you saw, move the way the way you were moving.
FEEL THE PEAK OF ECSTACY ON A DAILY BASIS!!
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Post by Ceran on Sept 20, 2021 13:21:16 GMT
The Secret to lasting change
The Seven Master Steps
To create the change you want.
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1. Understand their world
What is their issue?
What is their triad?
What is their crazy eight
2. Break the pattern
Using humour, challenge, surprising language to break habitual emotional pattern.
3. Find Leverage to motivate the change
What do they care about the most?
What is the most important thing for them? (desire to have a relationship, to be sucessfull, to have a baby, etc..)
4. Redefine the problem
What does lie underneath the problem?
Depression is not the problem but just a way to meet her needs (feeling loved and taking care of) in the short term
5. Create alternatives
Switch from depression to hope and joy
6. Condition the new behavior
7. Relate the change to a higher purpose
--> Challenge yourself, dig out what is going on and make a decision.
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Post by Ceran on Sept 20, 2021 15:53:31 GMT
The 6 human needs
Getting unstuck
Requires a need to growth
To make a change
To make a strong decision
There is a risk needed to take (to commit into a relationship, to stand up and teach, to speak up, etc..)
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Every life stage (school, 1st job, marriage, etc..) requires us to learn new way of doing
and then requires to growth
if we dont learn, if we keep doing the same habits,
we get stuck and then we get into the crazy eight
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The 6 Human Needs as a driving force
When the crazy eight gets reinforced by the 6 Human Needs
That's when the pattern becomes more challenging to change
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Why people do what they do?
To meet one of our 6 human needs
Most people keep their problem because it meets their needs
Certainty / Uncertainty / Significance / Connection & Love / Growth / Contribution
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Risking your greatest fear!!
Quality problems vs Safe problems
Quality problems involves a risky forward-thinking decision that wil take you to another stage of life (making a career shift, committing to a relationship, starting a family, leaving a relationship, moving out, confronting someone, asking for help, etc..)
Safe problem (depression, procrastination, addictions, blaming others, withdrawing from relationship) -> To keep ourselves safe from risking at our greatest fear.
When people come in front of a risky decision that is risky to make they will often develop a safe problem that will distract them from making a risky decision.
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